Abit Lonely

I tried to clean my house

I tried to do different things

Today

but I kinda feel like crying at this second

Maybe the songs from Muse

somehow, it stirs my heart - maybe it's the piano.

Maybe now, it's night time

The paradox that I am in

(I somehow sound like a schizophrenic person, haha)

I am so 100% OK with being alone or lonely

actually who can be OK with lonely?

I think I am ok with aloneness totally.

However, when there was a split moment of being NOT

that moment was so magical that kinda scared me for life

maybe took a part of my strength to withstand loneliness away

maybe it's a good thing so I dont think I am indeed a superwoman

So I want to cry now

no tears, just abit tearful only, no tears drop though

Just some feeling well-up

maybe it's my bday, but I also dont really care about bday much

but such damn day does make you reflect alittle

Maybe I wish I could miss someone at this day

yet I got no one to miss

Ai, I will be fine tmr....a new day

I always use alotta time to think the day before my bday

as it's the most sacred day for me since it's the last day of this year of age

Moving on to the next year of age is.........I still hv 365 days

I think....my next 365 days will be fabulous

magical

filled with GOOD surprises

I wish you all who read here have all the blessings too. 

LUV