Movies I watched within one week

Apart from previously mentioned Eternal Sunshine of Spotless Mind, I watched quite a no of movies on plane or at home. Here are the list:

1. let me in - a child vampire story. Interesting, but heard it was borrowed from a swedish film " let the right one in", I will search for it some day.

2. Girlfriend experience, starrred by ex AV gal Sasha Grey (?) - she isnt a bad actress at all. It just talks about how she struggles as an escort - connection? pure shag? while being in a committed relationship with a bf. 

3. Midnight in Paris - I never really like Woody Allen movies. I just dont like its vibe, not that I watched many of his. This one is cute, yet I feel the actors are not properly given a script, as U could feel some lines they improvised themselves. But I like the ending, kinda old school hollywood cliche movie ending, but sweet.

4. Thor - wow, actually it's not bad. I like it. I specially like his recklessness. It's not all goodie kind of superhero stories.

5. Biutiful - great performance, but I cant associate it too well. Though, I am watching it through someone's mind. :)

6. Fish Tank - my fren Dion said he preferred this than An Education. Ummm, I prefer the latter still, it has a touch of class and abit less realistic. Fish Tank is very cruel in its portrayal - and I always cant bear to see kids being treated this way, it's same as ABUSE by mom, family & society. It's too sad for me.

7. The Darjeeling Ltd - ummmm, cute. recommended. Very manhood searching for meaning but in a funny setting. My kind of film - abit fantasy, surreal.

8. Rewatched - Love Actually, The Fall, There's something about Mary

9. Some other I watched half way such as Water for Elephant, Fargo....if I got a chance will get the dvd since i picked them from the plane.

Whenever I am gloomy

I will watch few movies...which I guess I mentioned here before.

The first one is always Love Actually - becoz it makes one believe in something, or maybe round the corner, something may happen for me. I esp like the part where Collin Firth with the Portuguese fell in luv - it's abit surreal & fantasy. But sometimes, maybe language isnt that important? It's the sexual attraction....haha, or namely pheromones. 

Then, maybe I would watch Copy Cat as I always like serial killer stories. No matter how many times I watched this show, I never got bored and I got no reasons why. Yet, it gives me the thrill.

Then, it could be Sausalito - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0240880/ with Leon Lai. It's a simple but cliche love at first shag story, but it always reminded me that I went to Sausalito before just coz of the movie. And this movie is sweet.

Then also if I want to cry, I always watch The Fall - just luv the chemistry between the Roy (Lee Pace) and the romanian child actress. And it always makes me cry at the end - no matter how many times I watch it.

Now, maybe I will have a new addition - Eternal Sunshine of Spotless Mind. It reminds me alotta things somehow. I think afterall as I said before, I am a fairy tale gal. I like anything borderline fantasy or surreal. This movie is one.

What are your list?

Die hard? hehe

First Date

I am so excited for my good fren - C who is going on a first date today. I hope either this is the last first date or signify more dates to come......in regardless, both statement means good ending. 

I cant remember much usually my first date with anyone, I am usually pretty cool about it, as I didnt get too worked-up, but of coz at home I was always all ready & prepared. Ummm, but sometimes some first, U dont get memory on the spot, but the afterwards memory was significantly daunting & mesmerizing. 

The first kiss that makes you become a kid again

The first gaze that electrifies you

The first declaration of luv in a strange way or romantic way

The first goodbye for the luv U r in luv with

The first sleeping in the arm with the one you could really sleep with

The first tear

The first harsh stabbing pain

Well, of coz, after some time, the first I am talking about doesnt necessarily mean the first first, I think in order to really experience the "real first", we all may need the many first beforehands. Of coz, it would be wonderful if the first is the first memory, but maybe for me - I dont really work like that.

I suppose everything is the first always has its grand meaning to it, be it bad or good. They somehow worth remembering. But frankly, I dun even remember who is my real 1st bf or my 1st kiss, hehe. I am bad at that, as I dont like memory very much, be it bad or good.

But I do remember my "real first" kiss on the street, gently sometime ago - whereby we both could feel we suddenly turned into 2 kids, standing in the street, stealing our first kiss - I think this first real first kiss worth more imprinting for me, than  my first first kisssss (which as I said, I couldnt remember who and what the heck was his name) hehe.

Hope it doesnt confuse U. But

Yes I am excited for my fren and I hope - we will continue to find our first real or real first. It's magical when we could have the first real of the first of everything. And we will always have something to look forward to in our lives. :)

Seeing the world in a blurry vision

Lately, people around me start doing the eye laser thing - so their eye sight could be corrected. Since my sis did it, I started thinking - if one day I would like to undergo such a seemingly low risk and forever clear eyes surgery?

My answer is NO!

I think, for me, I enjoy seeing things in a blurry vision, i do not enjoy seeing everything clearly so to speak. The flaws, the imperfection or even the perfection - I dont really want to see with my physical eyes. I guess, I use more of my invisible eyes. hehe

The above I wrote like weeks ago, but I am glad Mr Z isnt gonna go ahead with it. Well, it's practically low risk but as I said - I prefer the choice of being blurred. What's the point of hving clear vision when U cant even see your inner self clearly? Ie my thinking - not disregarding if U already have done so or going to do so. Honestly, maybe one day when my nerve is creased I would go ahead & do it too.

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I just realize I got many drafts on my blog so I am retrieving them or discarding them. :)

Quotation 1

I luv citation, quotes - sometimes they contain such a dense messages. So I am attempting to do some quotes here.....starting from 28Aug 2011, initially I wanted to wait for 10 quotes, but since the last one, I couldnt come up with any.....seems BCN didnt inspire me much. Maybe I will think of Gaudi abit more later.......so here U go the first 6. Enjoy. Brainstorm, Feedback. Thanks.

Ding Ding Ding - just to make my brain synapse more....

1. Sometimes, someone just mystify your existence.

2. I want to say I have been a 20 yo for past 40 years (when I reach 59 yo - and looking forward to 60 - not in vampire's aspects though)

3. If he's the ONE, you will know it ONE day, but surely not Today.

4. Real BOREDOM seems such a happy & remote moment. No Nothing seems such a luxury.

5. Missing "us" is a better notion than Missing "You".
"Missing" us is more melancholic moment that "Being" solo.

6. Which one is harder?
Fighting a war or applying diplomacy?
Both requires strength, wit & patience.
So I have no answer as I am not the leader of the world.
But, one thing I know, at times, in love,
To fight is so much easier than not to.

Battle Fields

There are sayings in chinese:

"A redundant field no one wants, once the filed has been plowed on, everyone fights for that specific field" OR

"the nextdoor bowl of rice always smells better"

Ie what I am feeling past 2 months. To update you on my experience on men:

1. Mr Linkedin - I told him I could only have a friendly meal with him like few weeks ago if he came to HK. But since then, he gchat me, gmail me - which he wouldnt be so diligent in doing so before. Now I told him - no nothing, he gchatted me alot. So today, he asked again - No date for me?! I replied - sorry, I cant. I hope he would leave me alone. I am abit frightened by over-zealous guyz. I am not 18yo, I dont want that. It doesnt make me feel special - wanting to make me feel special, write me a poem. haha...ie more 16 yo stuff, but it may work on me. I think it's so wrong asking me or maybe galz......if we would be willing to go on a date with him so many times when I already said I couldnt, wouldnt.....esp I start to feel he's psychologically disturbed. Who would be so desperate to get laid? 

2. Mr Korean - we didnt keep in touch for........................maybe thousand of years. I had a 2 week fling with him when I was in LA. It's fun & he's sweet. Tall, played bass. Ie the reason I went out with him, hehe. But.........when I left he said "we just pauseeedddd and we would start again once we meet". I was thinking, ie really convenient for u, man! But then I didnt think we would meet again. So some months later, maybe even some years later after I left LA, he sent me a msg asking me if I got a bf yet. I said, of coz I had. He said, didnt we agree we "pause" and "re-start" later? I said, it's funny for you to remind me that when you havent been in touch with me.....like for years. And now, he msg me again telling me he would come to HK by end of the year. Why tell me that? To "restart"? Shits, in his fucking dreams!

3. Mr A - my ex. Same thing as Mr Korean. How we broke up was funny enough. It explains how men r such idiots at times, thinking all women just pause and wait for their gigantic manhood to fulfill them. We didnt officially break up but since he went back to UK - we didnt keep contact for over 6 months, so what did I expect? Of coz I found myself another bf.....hahahaha.........when he saw my pic with him on msn (which was there for more than 3 months then), he asked - who is the guy next to u? I said - my bf. He said - ummmmm, so have we broken up??????? hahahahahahaha..........my god. Now he's coming back, thou he came back few times asking to meet with me, I always got thousand of reasons I couldnt. Anyways, will see this time....what reasons I could use.

4. Then of coz another Mr V - which I officially deleted him from my life. At first, he said he luved me...HUH!!???????? I got really scared by that as we didnt even have an official date. Then next, I told him, sorry man, I couldnt "be" with U. He then said, he just wanted sex. I said, sorry dude, I disliked the SP thing. Disgusting term for me. I am not a strict person but I prefer good connection above all else. He then said, OK, he would put me in other category - yes what other cats? I would be his companion for hiking, dinner, etc but no sex. hahaahahhaah.............................well, I said, ie fine to be a friend. But when he asked me out - he complaint about my unavailability for shagging him. Shits, I left right there, as I told him - dude, U r fucking boring. To lure a gal, U dont blahablah complaining. Use your tiny brain, not your small penis. hehe (I didnt really say that....:P)

5. Some others......which r not as ridiculous & funny............

(edited as forgot to mention the BIGGEST ASS OF ALL)

This guy I worked with - I could say officially he destroyed my career life 3 years ago. And I was always appropriate & friendly, as the usual me. Pretensious, endearing, co-operative, opinionated at the same time during work - ANDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
I just realize he gossiped me to my another "colleague". :(
he said, I was not nice to him anymore since I knew he got married, which was like few months ago, but U know what he did after he got married? First he came to HK for basically to me no reasons - just to have meeting with me, then he insisted me to go to Taiwan with him in following week or som which I didnt want to at that time, as my dog was very sick. And when he came to HK that time, it was just weeks after his marriage - which I knew he was with his then gf for many years, though he told me all his betrayal secrets too.
But he hinted that I was into him to other people and now no more.....shits, what an ass. Yes he's french. But french isnt really like this I know. I think for surely he's psychologically disturbed with small dick. For sure. I never check so I dunno, but I guess if I am not into him, for surely my thrid eye could feel he has small dick! I am furious...what an ass to badmouth me like that, on top of other women he already badmouthed about. He's already 50.....is it midlife crisis or so?

ASS of the ASSES!!!!!
(thanks for lisenting)

I am not trying to brag, as I hvnt got much luck in dates or men for years. Yet, once something started, some funny coincidence upon coincidence occur.......though I am sure U hv something to say about women, I am fine with that, as many many coverage about women already said & done repeatedly. Coz they are all written by men. While, for women, sometimes yes we are more desperate coz we want to get married & have kids, blahblah. But aint we all ultimately just want to be less lonely on this earth? Why being so desperate? In shag or marriage? Will we be sure we wont be lonely after all these done & shit? But guess, yes surely men r from another planet, women from the next one........maybe if we could meet at the middle point, ideally, something wonderful could have been sparked.

Telepathy

I once had a story of 2 lovers who were apart, yet they could communicate via telepathy. I believe in such possibility. And I think somewhat I got that in my life. Certain times, I was writing something down - and this person would somehow send me a msg that kinda answered what I was asking or writing on the letter. 

Then, I kept hving dream of the same person today, for all 24 hrs. I mean if I did sleep for 24 hrs. One dream was quite weird, I was driving on the left side, must be BCN influenced, yet I cant actually drive. So I was stumbling on driving the car, which I could manage somehow - this car was that person's car, I also dunno why I was driving his car. Then, I looked to the right, I saw 2 french friends that I knew of in another car, next scene, they were already on my right seats. And somehow, they wanted to take over the driving, and it was like those fantasy dream in movies - one on the far right was kinda like whistling & dancing abit while moving around 2 things in front of the car- kinda like since now they are all the right hand side, so the tools should try to bend to the "left way". Then the middle gal was driving though the wheel was with me. It's kinda surreal. Yes also, there was no brakes - more like hidden brakes. And we reached a toll or something - and I gotta pay the toll , at the same time I opened a box of presents with many fruits in it - then I heard the telepathy message. He said I gotta no worries and he would pay for the toll and then also some other telepathic msg amongst the fruits. Weird......................

Gestures

If you want to see my pics in BCN, feel free to check out - https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10150762562515507.716459.730940506&l=abd8905ae4&type=1

I realized from the pics taking with my "colleagues" - they are not my real colleagues, long story - I sticking out tongues alot, U know why....as a whole, I felt uncomfortable in the env, tongue is the cutest & best hiding mask to date for me.

As some europeans ask me many times, why HK chinese like to have a sign of "V" when they take pics. It's not just HK, basically it's Japan, HK and most parts of Asia.....coz apart from signifying "victory" which was supposedly the original meaning - but for asians, they are not comfortable being ourselves, hving a "V" is like having a gadget or tool to hide our face or our insecurity. I am not sure if it's correct, but I am pretty sure I am. 

Then brought me to a woman I met during the trip, she was super alienated from the team. The group pic she always stood a meter away from everyone. And when she looked me at, she would scan from my shoes to my head then back to scanning my face - super weird. But somehow I know she isnt a bad person - so I kept smiling to her, tried to strike a conversation. But after 2-3 days, I wasnt going to do more, then she started talking with me - hehe....actually she was quite interesting to talk to.

Also, this goes back to....sometimes how much people would do to alienate themselves from others, or making certain gestures to mask their insecurity or uncomfyness.

O well, human nature, I suppose. :)

Opinionated vs Complaint

Had a discussion with one of the bosses in BCN....:P

We were talking about french and he isnt. He said he liked french "complaining" or what he called - "frankness" style, yet I said, to me they were complaining more. Ummm, well, upto your judgement. But I do appreciate their upfrontness in what things they dont like most of the time.

however, is there a fine line?

Yes of coz, there's a fine line in everything. So I thought for few days what the fine lines are.

Being opinionated, yes hv frankness in it, but it raises a "thought" without much emotion. And genuinely, they believe in what their opinions are being represented. It could be judgmental opinions, of coz....but usually they use the brains to raise the "opinions". It's about his/her view on what's right or what could have been better.

While, complaint - it is generated with emotions together with opinions. I think it's fine to complain once in a while, and it's healthy to do it. However, if one indulges in such - everything isnt right, everything could have done better - there's not even borderline "being opinionated". It's actually polluting the world with negative thoughts & energy.

What do you think?