Another Level of EQ

Working in a job, you need EQ.

Having a business, you need another level of EQ.

A job, you got stable income. There's no gambling in it that pisses you off or disappoints you. You got a monthly stable income, downside is you may need to watch out the faces of your boss.

A business doesnt guarentee a stable income. It's a game of gambling - you may make alot or you lose it all. Actually losing it all is better than piling up the debts. You need to get prepared the hightened EQ to handle your clients, your clients' staff, your suppliers, your partner, maybe your staff as well.......even they are cunny & nasty, you need to learn to stay silent at the right time & slash out at the right time, too. Learn to smile, but devise a plan to revenge or take back what they have taken you - during this time you need to make nice to avoid your plan flop. Even there's no revenge involved, you gotta think if they are going to trash your next move, afterall you once trusted them. The EQ to handle every aspect is overwhelming alone, but that's what I am facing now.

Yet, I so realize my EQ has come to a stage that I couldnt imagine I could possess. I mean, I wasnt born a positive, emotionless person!

And I am not losing hope on partnership too. Just that, I gotta be careful with who I partner with in the future.

Names

After some fucking living on this planet earth for 38 years, I have some categories of names that you should sway yourself from. From own personal expericence & research.

ERIC:

I met 2 Erics that I got close relationship with. One is my ex. One is my business partner. I tell you, they are totally fucker, lazy but want to gain money w/o doing much work. Seriously, my frens, with such name, stay away plz.

Fiona:

I cant remember what happened between us. I got one Fiona only, but it had something to do with trust & money too. And when I was telling my fren about it, she shared very similar experience. So beware too.

Dawn:

Always neurotic with a hint of stupid faith in stuff. Yes me, I just know me as Dawn. Dont stay away, but hit me on the head all the time when I get too idiotic, plz.

My new view on Adam & EVE

IT"S BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!!

OK, one of my guy frens....he knows who the heck he is (kekekeke), as I told him I was gonna write here. He said something nasty....but we made up so wont mention it ever again. U'd better NOT!!! But one thing he kept saying was that I gotta find a nice guy.,,,nice guy,,,,,nice guy,..........................to COMPLETE me!!!!! I told him, honestly without hard-feeling of my past, I seriously enjoyed my single life too much. I am sucker for space, if anyone knows me well, ie why I have insomnia.

Why I have insomnia? Simple. Lets say I go out for 5 hours, when I get home, I need min. 5 hrs to be by myself doing nothing or anything............I cant enjoy the day w/o being by myself for the "supposedly by myself" period.

OK, about completing oneself. Really. I doubt anyone here finds oneself complete coz U r attached or U r married. I believe if you dont know yourself well, you are not complete with yourself, NO ONE, NO ONE can complete you. How many of us in this world find ourselves so uncomfortable being with himself/herself ALONE?!?! Does it mean, hving someone close by make U more comfortable? Then, can you be with that person 24 hrs alone, even while U r doing some serious shitting????????????? Sometimes, without someone, you may only find it less convenient, as air tickets - buy 2 U get cheaper fare. Hotel room, double is cheaper than single. Restaurants, a table with 2 seats instead of one seat. Or for a woman, no one helps u changing the light bulb (actually some guys dont even do that themselves!!!!!) or carry your heavy laundry. ONLY inconvenience, NOT incomplete when you dont have someone nearby!

While, lets go back to Adam & EVE. Actually, if according to the Bible, God created EVE coz ADAM was lonely. So he found a way to complete ADAM. No one ever said EVE was needed to be complete. It's ADAM - THE MAN - who was/is/has been in need for completion. So very daringly, I would say, the womam EVE was perfect! hehehehehe.........so it's wrong to tell a woman that she needs a man to complete her! Well, in retrospect, I would also jump to conclusion that why women need to endure period pain, birth pain - coz we actually convinced the imperfect ADAM to eat the fruit (no one ever said it was AN APPLE) - so we are perfectly imperfect, in somewhat, evil.

For me, I want to stay single until I find the right guy. My mom asked me why I didnt stay with the GREAT GUY (Anthony), so I wouldnt have to suffer. I tell you, my frens, if I would have stayed with him, you would never get a chance to know me. As I know me well that, I know I would surely commit suicide. Not coz he's a nice guy or a bad guy - just simply I couldnt achieve my purpose in life, while feeling guilty all the time for myself, and for him - I would surely jump. No matter how much I suffered for past few years, it was my choice, it was my purpose to learn something. But if I got stuck with just convenience, as far as I know, I would rather die than live for that.

I luv u dearly as a fren.....kekekekekeke, as long as we will go on a trip to Phuket next year or U buy me a return ticket to Melb. ^^

I am a workaholic but also a playaholic

I still have no money.

But I am so happy these few days as I am supposed to think of at least 3 projects.....coming to 4 after today's meeting. Someone is asking if I want to work with him in Shanghai......today. I feel so happy as I could use my brain actively & crazily. I guess I am a workaholic. I was depressed big time as no one was using my brain.

Yet, I also think - so if I got so much projects going on. How can I swim? Hang out? I want to do both......I realize time is so limited for someone like me....who wants to work and play all the time.

YET, I AM HAPPY HAPPY!!

Another fisherman

Talked to another fren who is a fisherman too. We find each other very intelligent. LOL

He opened few co doing pretty well, based on similar fisherman concept of living. YEAH! I am relieved, and now I have a good Monday.

Conclusion is that - we should encourage others more. Dont step on people. Dont make negative comment all the time. Make a joke to cheer someone that day, esp Monday.

Ranking

As I am glancing through my blog entry categories, I realize I have my own ranking.

Me of coz is always Number One. Then it's about people. Then, Movie. Then dogs.

Luv is really minimal, guess it suits me. I am not a very luving person, thou I am compassionate. I dont regard this as top priority of my life, thou in the past I used to think it was. I am constantly amazed at how life, experience has refined me to who I am now.

if you are talking about in luv, I feel I am so in luv with my dogs. Esp lottie now, she always luvingly gazes at me, like she couldnt keep her eyes off me. This kinda of luv constantly makes me smile & happy.

My First White Hair

I know it should be called Grey Hair but the one I found is indeed shinny white. Since I started dying my hair, I never found any white hair at all. I occasionally would ask my stylish if they could spot any at the roots, usually they always complimented my hair as dark rooted as anyone would wish. 

Now,

I got mine.

I totally disagree that if you think too much, you got your white hair. Though in some cases, if one is that stressed, not just their hair is compromised, everything inside or outside of their bodies would be compromised. I had 2 years of extreme stress & anxiety, I only found my 1st white hair - not a bunch of whities, so using me as an experiment, my point is valid. hehe

Mememto , Momento

Shit, I always said "mOmento".

Finally, I watched this, thanks to my dear friend Dion. He actually gave me the disc as he now only goes & gets himself blu-ray, hehehehee, to my benefits.

I watched few of Chris Nolan's movies lately, actually, I realized I watched most of his movies except Following & this. This one blew my mind the most. I really like that he's so dark and honest. This movie reminds me that. How many a time we want to lie to ourselves?!?! How often we all live in our own universe? Yet, not many dare to say they are not living in reality but their own fairy tale. O well, not for me to judge! :P

It's a constant effort to be honest. Just like in the moive, for Lenny, it's a constant effort to make him believe in his own lies too. It's a dual effect. U couldnt get it w/o another.

Human mind is so powerful. Some said, the collective conscience built the pyrimaid. I think it's so possible. Ar, sidetrack again.

Yawn, sleep now. Have a good week ahead everyone!!

KISSES!!

P.S. He actually "Gained major funding during the 1999 Hong Kong Film Festival by showing his film Following (1998) and then asking the audience to donate money to his next film Memento (2000).

BRAVO HongKIE, Bravo!

Lately,

Various friends or people have come to ask me to be involved in some projects. Guess, they know I am in desperate need for money. The fields are really scattered. Some are not even my expertise. 

As a fisherman, I take on everything. I think, to some, it may not be right in a business term. Yet, I am THE business. My brain is my business. I got nothing to offer but to sell my brain and time. What do I want in return? These are the main concerns for me.

I want enough salary to afford my livelihood. Buy food for my dogs and save some for their in-case of emergency such as desex, surgery, etc etc.....those cost alot. I need freedom. I dont want to go back to a job. Stability vs freedom. I want freedom. I NEED a holiday, which I didnt really have for maybe few years. But my holiday will no longer be purely holiday. As a fisherman, I will go around to search for fish. So it will always be work+holiday => if not I would feel upset. Business opportunity has already so gel-ed, so stuffed, so grown into my every thinking & my being. I become IT.

I am going through the poorest stage of my life, but I am at my most contented page. So, friends, dont worry I am not treating myself good. Actually I like it. I just want ti say it here, how life has evolved me. There's no right or wrong in this aspect if I am contented with it, rite?

Big Whale catcher or a fisherman

Was talking to a friend today, who has her business as well. It's always good to have talks with people like these, as I could get a chance to re-evaluate some of my thinkings. Well, she gave me some good suggestion, indeed. I am always blessed to have people who are selflessly sharing secrets with me.

It got me thinking. Some people work great as a whale catcher, while, some like me are good to be a fisherman. I dont have the skills, or I dont plan to learn the skills that well to be so focused at catching a big whale. I could say they work smart way, as all they need to do is seasonally spotting for a good whale.

While, for fisherman, yes we need to wait for the great season too, but we need to work the stupid way - cast the net, catch the fish, then categories various fishes into the right place. The profit margin is less, unlike the whale catcher, really. I believe higher profits should go to people who are so focused.

I thought about it. Could I be like that? Really, I know myself I cant. Id rather be a fisherman. I really want to see if one day I could catch a fish with a golden spoon in its mouth or not, or if it's so rare I wouldnt need to work for the rest of my life coz of its fish. Guess, 1. I am living in my own universe, 2. I believe in miracle, 3. I am a gambler.