Excuses & apology

Hey yo! Morning from Rome!
I wrote 2 entries yesterday but I know my spelling was horrible with the ever illogical grammar n tenses! Anyways - excuse 1 is that I was using iPad. Excuse 2 is that I was freaking tired! Excuse 3 is I used to get horrible English teachers!

So apology offered n just accept it, if u may!

I got no resolution for 2013 as somehow it passes the same way as 2012! But everyday I try to set a goal - n guess I'll try to write everyday here in Rome! Cudnt sleep much still - supposed - I'm used to the walking pain already!!

Hv a good day!

The trevi

Rome, is a city u have to walk soooooo much! I don't know why those SEA pple kept saying " u hongkies need to walk a lot ehr!?" I walked for 2 years already after 3 days here! Shits, I once thought of going to those pilgrimage , I think I won't be able to make it. I will die there! I am not kidding! I will definitely die!!!!

And so I set out to walk and walk today and....from coliseum to...somewhere then to find the fountain of Trevi! Ok well, I got lost....I cud feel my way usually, but I got lost! I started thinking.....finding luv is a journey to some, if u r serious about it. And it may not mean u will ever find it as usually if its sthg u want, it definitely has hurdles, so u set out....u try to hear the sound, the whisper of the gushing water....u cudnt. So u stop and eat as its really brutal out there. Then u found pple who r quite cold....and u got ur stomach filled, u walk again....u try to look at maps....u try to try ur luck.....u try to just stop and have a smoke to cool off.....still, where r the arches that lead u there....u can't see.....

So....by the time u r going to give up

Maybe u stop....u will ask...maybe from god, or from tarot readers ( to be frank, I was thinking about this while trying to find my way to the fountain of luv, and there I saw tarot cards after 2s of my thoughts!!) .... Yes so u consult....somehow they show u the way, but its just the direction. It's upto u to continue on to walk it! The funny thing is......when u seem u r lost, pple start to ask u for direction! Do I seem like an Italian Chinese!? Anyhows, I think I do a gd con to make most pple believe I actually live at that place most of the time! It's by not looking around.....being a solo traveller, I ind this helps me a lot by looking utterly ruthless!!!! Haha.....

Back to where I want to talk abt. Love.....

Okok....still a long way to b there n u got it....yet, pple in front of u crowded u from walking close. Mayb u shud try harder, maybe I shud just project a coin surpassing hordes of heads w my superhero strength, but at that moment, I felt.....it's not worth it, as I want to keep my 1 € coin instead....coz what if, I have a pee urgency that I need that freaking coin for it!?!? So I looked, I turned......I realize from my way there, there's no any signs of the fountain.....yet, I also realize, I was so close on my first day......so close....from that side, there was actually a sign! Ok....

The moral of the story is

For love, love will find u, but for some, u hv to find it

Still, u still gotta work for it

Still, when u reach there, u may not want to throw the coin

Months pass.....

How to begin here?

I have become an irregular! Gosh! What happened!? I can only say....I am starting to have grey hair! At least a regular one strand! They say, if u pull one, there grows 7 ones. Hence pple usually don't do the plucking! Not me, as I don't believe I have! Rather, I believe it will be healed! Let me give u an eg!

My dog shadow- a sausage dog, at her 14-15 yo age, still owns glossy shiny black hair! And coz I never want her to grow old. Not that I want to be forever young, as a matter of fact, I have been envisioning or rehearsing the moment of my own last breath. Death has been a strange thought to me lately. I don't believe I am going to die soon, but rehearsing it somewhat makes me want to look at the present more! Maybe it's strange or taboo to some, but somewhat it works on me!

ESP when I am standing, walking on paths of the ancient......first Egypt , today Rome.....I somewhat was thinking (not that I am so romantica) how those who thought they wud be forever young and powerful gladiators, Pharaohs, or pope....they once stepped on where I was....even the fishermen in the past from hk.....now I am standing there, they once stood....and one day, another dawn wud be sitting at where I am at....pondering how they might live forever.....or how they r so depressed, stressed or how they will be one day blah......

So I am rehearsing that moment, maybe force me to have no regret when I breathe last one day! Maybe it doesn't make sense, but....then I realize.....one thing.....seeing places I never see, seems strange to me now. Everywhere is so similar....in its different sense. 

Oh, one thing, usually a place I go, I at times felt I was there. Definitely egypt I had that feeling, not Rome though....I don't think I am going to fall in luv with this place....now everywhere I go, I just want to do research in advance so that maybe I cud bring my mom here! 

Gosh, this piece sounds so boring...li was thinking to write about finding my way to the "fountain of love" - maybe it wud seem more enchanting.

Anyways just some irregular regular thoughts.

Happy Chinese New Year of year of snake.

Now I don't even know the significance of the animal. One thing, if there's a past life, I shudnt be living even close to Asia, very likely I wud be a middle eastern woman living in the desert or actually some form of royal heritage! Coz I am quite an ass in this lifetime.

Cheerios.