See My Past

As I was rambling on bitching about some crazy guyz, I at the end....did meet up with my ex. :P The thing is my toilet light was out, he was kind enough to offer to change for me. We had a nice time, but one thing - haha - he kept saying "I hate CHU" (I hate U) which was our sweet talk long time ago. Basically, I just ignored him. I really think I am a freaking passionately hot human being, yet I could be a damn cold bitch at times.

Then we had a nice dinner, chat. And thanks to him, he kinda vindicated me something that has been marginally bothering me, which is, I have been called "High maintenance". I have tried to argue my way through with people to justify their accusation, hehe. The fact is, if people think U r, there's no way to fend off anyways. So I accepted this accusation on the surface. Coz honestly, how could someone not money-minded, no demand in bf wealth or gifts showering be high maintenance. And also, I dont buy branded goods much at all...maybe every 5 years once? Well, though, I like unique stuff, chic looking bags, yes I love shoes very much, and also vintage......well how can a gal so in love with getting people used clothes, bags, shoes be....high maintenance?!?! :)

Anyhow, I asked him - so people say I am high maintenance, what do you think? He - U? No way, how could you be? I - yea, fucking rite, how could I be. And the only thing I am high maintenanced of is intelligently, emotionally & mentally, apart from that I got not much request. Thanks to him, now I feel so much better!!!!!! hehe......though somewhat he still thinks I am a bitch. The cute kind, :)

And after seeing him, I feel like - it was my past life. I was abit different back then. Clingy, jealousy plagued, etc etc....and all the men I was with, they were kind of weak or poor....hehe....ie not a way to badmouth them, I know but that's the fact. And by stopping dating for almost 2 years, it really helps me to re-adjust my inner esteem and decide more what I want now. 

Frankly, I feel happy to see him becoz it's like finally - not just I got vindicated, but I also got cleared of my certain karma in relationships. And I am delighted to see that from his past reliance on me for daily living roof or food, he's now a stand alone person with quite good future....anyhow, I am always glad to see the men I sent back to the world are well & all.

:)