Finally, Understood

When I came back from Aus & S'pore, studying & working,  more than 10+ years ago, I met a group of people who I sometimes would mention to some of my frenz - they are what I call - "wee wee wun wun" people ie spiritual gang, close to astrologists, witches, psychic and stuff like that. They would chant to the moon which I wud never be allowed to attend. One of them once asked me if I ever studied spiritual or read any of such books. I said, never....everything I thought through my experience & observation around me (people, the world affair), esp I wasnt much of a reader then. She was quite astonished at the point and said - u have quoted the specific phase & words that need us to pay great deal of money to learn, u r so weird. Well, I took it as a compliment and never really investigated why she said that.

As mentioned, I found few books. They were not the spiritual books, but more on the study of it, in a more scientific ways. Well, maybe to the religious pple, these are cultish. Actually I find it quite interesting, esp I luv reading books with either 1. out of their own experience; 2. filled with chunk of research that I could actually find to verify. And these books I got are more of the 2nd type this time. And I am amazed, as I read on - they indeed quote some of the stuff I always talk about or think about but I could never really express in such an eloquence.  So this reminded me of what my fren talked about. 

And I sometimes think religious people are too secluded. They miss out the point of why we are here - I got no answer, guess I sound more judgemental then. But as I observe religious people, they dont look around and understand stuff more. And I find many a time those who are against them tend to understand more of their religion than themselves. I remember once I asked about Judaism to some who claimed they are of this religion, thou actually they dont really practise it. But they were against Jesus being the Messiah. So I asked them why. I think they told me....they didnt really read the OT so......they just knew and Oh yes, a pass-on knowledge.

And I always dislike christians who quote what pastors say even when I was a devoted christian back then in Australia. I would question them why you thought whatever pastors said were right. They would answer me becoz THEY WERE THE PASTORS. Honestly, I felt sad for them. So stupid. So innocently naive. When, if they believe, God gave them the love letter pounded in the Bible, they would not even bother to verify, but would prefer to believe in a mere human being who was chosen to be a pastor?!?!?! Ummm, sorry, I cant accept it at all. I remember just for one topic of Holy Spirit, I shut myself for at least 1 month to go through every word with the spirit in it in the bible, thou I am not saying that;s the way to do it......but at least, I believe we should try to verify if it's right or not. But then of coz if we want to be a comfy religious person, it's cool too, as long as it brings U peace & joy. 

I hope I dont bring too much resentment from what I said.....guess I would in some ways, but then as my dearest christian frenz who know me....I am not in the same path as before. Sorry.

Anyhows, I realize that somehow we could be really blinded.....hving pre-deposited belief that something is bad.

As I am reading 1Samuel again, what strike me is that in one of the chapters, it talked about how King Saul summoned the spirit of Samuel (the prophet who annointed Saul as King and passed away) via a medium. And actually Samuel spoke to Saul and told him that God would not help him any longer. The thing intrigued me wasnt the mediumship, but.....by myself. 

I have been reading the OT many times, I esp like OT more actually since young, though it was very hard to read through their family tree, esp in HK, nobody cares about family tree, unless U carry a distinguished family name. However, I am pretty sure I read 1 Samuel at least more than twice, at least, if not 3rd or 4th time, I never could recollect I read such channeling thing ever. I think.....my own theory.....I was automatically blinded myself when I read as no church or christians ever talked about it coz it's evil. But it was in the bible though. OK, well, then our defence wud be.....it's by King Saul consulted a desert medium. But excuse me, why wud it be put in there, esp Samuel, being the prophet, spoke back. Have we missed something during the history of men or the evolution of christianity? 

OK, then the arguement would be - it's the NT time, the jesus time. But, then still could we omit the fact that channeling was actually a practice in the past? And is it possible that it's not an evil thing afterall.? I am just attempting to think in more objective way - coz if just another spirit....then fine, but it's Samuel.....so....it's abit baffling. U see.

I am not sure - as I still think there's no right or wrong coz we human simply DONT KNOW in this plane. And now, I will continue on what I am doing, reading the bible while researching other information in a more organized scientific research way. To be frank, I feel less confused.......even with this amount of info....than when I was sitting steadily in church when I was a young adult.

PS:
1. Religion is always a very sensitive topic and ie why I would never openly discuss it, as I dont see the point anymore. Coz I am not to win or convert non chrisitans or something like that. I am just trying to bring out a point that maybe we should be viewing things more in a eagle-eyed view, more macroscopic way at times.......and how easily sometimes when we are so devoted on something based on the bias of a belief or own view, we could bypass some info (despite they are important or not). 
2. I could only quote chrisitanity or judaism as I just know them slightly more. Other religion, not really, but then I do experience similar microscopic comment.
3. I highly respect (though she wud say no need to mention, haha) my roomate - E, who sternly & plainly told me that if she wudnt cling onto the bible and believe in it, what faith does she really have? I completely agree with her and her words always have some impact to me, as little does she believe & know - I respect her as a christian the most than most other ones (despite the highly regarded ones) coz of the simple faith she has - well she studies alot on the Word, even went to Bible school. So I would listen to her or ask her more about the Word than any living chrisitian. :)